This day had me falling, no, more accurately I should say actively digging down as deeply into my heart and my psyche as God would let me go without losing my mind.  Not somethin’ you do every day.  Also not something I recommend as recreation either.

I am still working weekly with Micaela Pennell, my Texas Toastmaster and life coach extraordinaire, and more importantly, beautiful friend.

I mention this because I know it is all tied together- my speech, my life coaching, the things being explored: God is using these things to teach me what I need to know.  The journey has become more accelerated and pronounced this year, or maybe I’m finally developing a strand of maturity amidst the tomfoolery and becoming more aware of things happening.  It’s hard to say if that’s the case because I still screw up so often and so epicly.  Just ask my family.

I won’t go into detail because it would take hours anyway and this isn’t the place for it.  Yet.  I see though, that the speech I have constructed thus far is the top thick layer of stuff that I needed to break through to begin the slog through the mire that will free my heart and soul from the dark places they have been crouching in for decades.

This I find so encouraging, in the truest sense of the word.  It is planting courage in me for the future.  And I am so excited about what’s to come.

I wasn’t able to get much work done on the speech in the 2 days prior to today because of household stuff that had to be attended to and one really bad mood day that ensured that the whole family suffered too.  Misery normally loves company but here, it demands it.

We also got a new Pope yesterday so we were addicted to the coverage.  It.  was.  INCREDIBLE.  I really love my new Papa.

Back to the speech.  I drilled it at least 20 times today and the back half an extra 5 times.  Taped it and as I speak, it is downloading to youtube for Rich to look at in a few hours.   So I need to get my ass to bed.  2 hours ago.